Gaslighting is a form of psychological control and manipulation. It consists of a gaslighter is a person who is psychologically manipulating and controlling the gaslightee (victim) by compelling them to question their sanity and perception of reality. The term “gaslighting” came from the play “Gaslight” of 1938. Today, we’ll discuss how to respond to gaslighting in the workplace; signs, examples, common phrases, and how to deal with gaslighting at work.
Personality Traits and Characterizes of Gaslighter
- Narcissistic capabilities
- Controlling and manipulating the person to the point of disempowering them
- Constantly targeting the flaws and Insecurities of the other person
- Limited self-esteem and self-worth
- Manipulative personality
Signs of Gaslighting in the Workplace
- Excluding you from the meetings and events relevant to your job and work
- Gaslighter Belittles your perception, efforts, and emotions
- Spreading false and negative gossip and rumors about you
- Gaslighter Saying negative things about you publically
- Constantly telling you about your negative performance
Gaslighting Phrases in the Workplace
- “I was just joking” when you answer them
- “It is not what happened”
- “I have no idea, what you are talking about”
- “I didn’t say that you forgot”
- “It seems like you are unstable”
- “You’re becoming overly emotional”
- “You’re paying a lot of thought to it”
- “You don’t have to take it personally”
- “You are being over-sensitive”
- “You should calm down and don’t need to become upset”
Examples of Gaslighting in the Workplace
Some of the main examples of gaslighting in the workplace are as follows;
Don’t Remember
The gaslighter has the tendency and capability of forgetting things and they question your memory. For instance, you left the report on the desk of your boss, but he is adamant that he didn’t receive it. The reason you’re certain is that you stayed up late at home to finish the report. Your boss’s refusal is confusing you whether you have misplaced it or someone misplaced it from his desk.
However, every possible scenario of misplacement and misremembering would further confirm the gaslighter version of the story. It is unfortunate for you that you are a victim of a gaslighter’s working environment.
Becoming Defensive
When you try to stand up for yourself and try to address the issue, the gaslighter will become defensive because they don’t like being challenged or questioned. In order to maintain control over their victims, they focus on finding a way of manipulating you that it is your fault.
For instance, if you question their inappropriate jokes and behaviors in the workplace; they put the blame on you that you are not tough and resilient enough. Their jokes are about your gender, culture, behavior, and personality, and they really are out of line.
How to Respond to Gaslighting in the Workplace
Let’s discuss how to respond to gaslighting in the workplace, and the main tips are as follows;
Recognize Gaslighting
First of all, you should recognize a gaslighter from a rude and narcissistic person in the workplace. If it is the gaslighter, then you should be kind to yourself and focus on self-care. You should keep in mind that the goal of a gaslighter is to confuse and manipulate you. Before doubting yourself, you should reach out to friends, family, and colleagues to ask for their perspective.
Record their Behavior
In order to deal with the gaslighting, you should start recording and documenting your interaction with the gaslighter. For instance, take a screenshot of their message, record their call, take notes of the time and date of their interaction with you, save their emails, and take a picture of delivering the file and the document.
The objective of recording and documenting is to have a future reference for colleagues and yourself. You should repetitively remind yourself that a gaslighter is the problem and not you.
Find Support Group and Self-Care
While dealing with the gaslighting working environment, you should put all the focus on yourself and find the support focus group. You should keep reminding yourself that there is nothing wrong with you and they’re the problem. It allows you to maintain a positive perspective about your behavior without taking it personally. Negative self-talk would discourage and disappoint you, you should engage in activities to boost your morale and confidence level.
Meet Gaslighter
It is difficult, but you should confront the negative behavior of the gaslighter in the working environment. You should be specific about the events that are jeopardizing your work; use a confrontational tone and body language. It is significant to highlight the fact that other people are having performance and remembering issues, which is why he is specifically targeting you.
Aggravate If Nothing Works
When every other strategic approach doesn’t work, you should arrange a meeting with the HR manager or the senior management. Present all the records and evidence before them, keep the issue in their attention, and call it psychological abuse.
Conclusion: Respond to Gaslighting in the Workplace |How to Deal with Gaslighting at Work
After an in-depth study of respond to gaslighting in the workplace; we have realized that gaslighting is a serious issue. If you are learning about how to deal with gaslighting at work; then you should keep in mind the abovementioned examples, signs, causes, and tips to deal with it.
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